So they’ve both swiped right. Now they’re meeting for the first time. Facing each other. As if that’s a normal thing to do.

She’s being uncomfortable, and he’s a total bore. The vibe is horrific and the banter is even worse. But something is keeping them in their seats. Something is making them stay.

With acid wit, Miriam Battye’s new play takes a scalpel to modern romance, interrogating what we really talk about when we talk about love.

Fringe First winner

1hr 10mins (no interval)
Age Guidance: 14+

A co-production with Northern Stage, ETT (English Touring Theatre), Shakespeare North Playhouse and Théâtres de la Ville de Luxembourg.

A struggling and divided nation, tearing itself apart. So, when the Macbeths see their chance at the crown, why shouldn’t they take it?

But things don’t go according to plan. Dreams quickly turn to nightmares, humanity erodes, nature stirs. As society strives to make sense of the darkness that sits inside it, how long will it take for people to fight back against the endless cycle of violence and corruption?

A visceral and contemporary new production that speaks to a world we find ourselves living in now, and asks why has Macbeth haunted our fears and nightmares for centuries and what lesson is this cautionary tale still urgently trying to communicate to us?

2hrs 30mins
Age guidance: Brave 12 year olds plus

Food is a gift. Something you give to others. A privilege. An excuse to be with the ones you love.

Back home, the mouth-watering flavours and aromas of traditional Peruvian cooking were forbidden in Pepa’s home, except when Grandma would sneak in a steak and some spices. In England, Pepa found herself on a journey, a journey inside herself, to discover that food could be shared with a new family around a new table. And you’re invited to taste it. Through her own experiences, Duarte takes us on an exciting journey that will make us reflect on our own relationship with food.

Join Pepa Duarte (A Fight Against, Royal Court) for a full sensory experience exploring womanhood, body image and tradition in her debut play directed by Sergio Maggolio (The Dark Stone, Cervantes Theatre, Ovalhouse and Arcola).

55 mins
Age Guidance: 16+
Content Warnings: Body image and appearance

“The most feel-good show in town” (Daily Mail) has served up nostalgia, music and laughter at Edinburgh Fringe, sold out venues across the UK and had the seal of approval from Victoria’s colleagues, school-chums and fans.

Featuring the star of BBC1’s All Together Now, Paulus The Cabaret Geek and with accompanist Tom Guest, join them as they take you on a whistle-stop tour of 21 of Victoria’s best-loved songs, including the hilarious Ballad of Barry & Freda and the classic It Would Never Have Worked.

Dust off your stilettos and oven glove, and don’t forget the custard creams.

85 mins
Age Guidance: 10+ (one instance of strong language)

A Rhum + Clay Production

Their choice? To die onstage – or off it.

Beautiful and bonkers – it’s the clown show about totalitarianism we never knew we needed.

Informed and inspired by conversations with international artists living under authoritarian regimes.

Rhum + Clay return after 2019’s smash hit The War of the Worlds and 2018’s The Stage Award-winning Mistero Buffo.

Originally commissioned and premiered at New Diorama Theatre.

70mins
Age Guidance: 12+

Cult cabaret superstars Bourgeois & Maurice make their Northern Stage debut with a spectacular show that puts the FUN back into our fundamentally pointless existence!

Packed with whip-smart songs and jaw-dropping outfits, Pleasure Seekers sees the sinister singing siblings at their hilarious best as they attempt to dedicate their lives to optimism, hedonism and non-stop pleasure. How could they possibly fail?

Join B&M as they bellyflop head-first into a joy jacuzzi, with the hilariously savage wit and unique brand of pop-satire that has made them one of the UK’s most subversive and original musical acts.

Gloriously unhinged yet bizarrely life-affirming, this new show is a high-energy homage to hedonism in all its filthy, fabulous glory.

1hr 15mins (no interval)
Age Guidance: 16+

Close To Home Productions proudly presents…

Happy boobs. Sad boobs. Naughty boobs. Scared boobs… Poorly boobs.
From bra fittings to breast cancer diagnosis, Lucy’s boobs tell her story in 60 minutes – the time it takes to perform a standard lumpectomy.

Co-created with women who have experience of breast cancer and those who treat them, Identities unclasps the hidden adventures our boobs go on; the good, the bad and the silly.

After a successful 5* tour in 2022, Close To Home are thrilled to be touring the UK again with their debut play. Supported by Culture Warrington, Prevent Breast Cancer and Arts Council England.

The performance on the 5th October will be followed by a post-show discussion.

In the hours before a live TV debate, a young activist and a spokesperson for the ruling party meet in an isolated house in a forest. These political, ideological and religious adversaries must sit and wait, fearful of the coming conflict. The forest is haunted by the spectre of a wild leopard, once caged within the crumbling house, but now free to roam and terrorise at will – but only some can see the beast and hear him roar.

As crowds gather demanding to attend the debate, mounting paranoia and horror collide in an explosive unravelling of political convictions and personal histories.

Kali Theatre presents thought provoking, contemporary new plays by women writers with a South Asian background which reflect and comment on our lives today. Their award-winning productions have won rave reviews, sell out performances and inspired audiences throughout the UK and beyond.

80 mins (no interval)
Age Guidance: 14+

“A nation that devours another will one day devour itself”.

Set when The Great Devouring comes home, England & Son is a one-man play written specifically for the award-winning political comedian Mark Thomas by award-winning playwright Ed Edwards (The Political History of Smack and Crack, Paines Plough’s Roundabout, Soho and UK tour).

This is the first play Mark has ever performed in that he has not written himself.

With some deep, dark laughs – and some deep, dark love – along the way, England & Son emerges from characters Mark knew in his childhood and Ed’s lived experience in jail.

Prepare for Mark to take you on a kaleidoscopic odyssey where disaster capitalism, empire, stolen youth and stolen wealth merge into the simple tale of a working-class boy who just wants his dad to smile at him.

Fringe First winner

1hr 20 mins (including interval)
Age Guidance: 14+ (Contains references to violence and drug use)

After dismantling a barge, doxxing himself in the Doubletree, and blanking on the 1992 Ipswich Town crest (Taskmaster, Off Menu, University Challenge), Ivo Graham ropes his audience into more chaos against the clock.

“Humiliation’s your thing, right?” his brother asked him at Christmas, and, with the full existential ramifications of that still being processed, he’s lining up a show with more risk than ever before.

(NB: previous shows have broadly been quite low risk).

Presented by Northern Stage, Dance City and Gem Arts

Why is the world scared of female sexual desire? In this powerful solo work, Aditi Mangaldas reflects on a question that is more urgent than it has ever been. Why are women the world over, from conservative as well as liberal societies; sanctioned, judged, controlled, hounded and eventually punished to have the courage to own their desire?

In a unique dance vocabulary of contemporary dance based on Kathak, FORBIDDEN looks to explore the root of this fear and persecution. Underscored by a wide range of cultures from across the globe, Aditi will journey through emotions and experiences, reclaiming her desire.

The work is in three parts:

Awakening: Dream, Fragrant flower, Cage

Playing the Game: Denial, Adornment, Seduction, Rage

Burning: My story, Consigning to flames all that is FORBIDDEN

1hr approx
Age Guidance: 16+ (Contains mature sexual themes)

Written by Catrina McHugh MBE

Directed by Laura Lindow

Co-Created with sex worker activists

The award-winning Open Clasp are back with their first major international production co-created with sex worker activists from Aotearoa/New Zealand, Ireland and the UK.

An underground community of sex workers scattered across the globe and rooted in their fight for justice stand together, deciding enough is enough. Connected by invisible threads that build the power and strength they need to make a change above ground, Mycelial is activism and theatre at its best.

From Open Clasp: the feminist theatre company behind Key Change – New York Times Critics’ Pick and Sugar on BBC iPlayer.

Age Guidance: 15+

Fresh on the heels of his critically acclaimed memoir, Nailing It, Montana’s transatlantic messenger returns with new rants, knife-edge observations, thrilling musical interludes and an ever-formidable knack for laughs on the fly. You’ll pay for the whole seat, but you’ll only need the edge of it.

Vital and incredulously angry. Hilarious.” – The Scotsman

“Blissfully funny” – Guardian

**** “One hour of stonking stand-up and another of stomping hoedown mayhem. That’s two top gigs in one” – The Mail On Sunday (Event)

2hrs including interval
Age Guidance: 14+ (Contains strong language and adult content)

Adapted by Lemn Sissay OBE. Directed by Scott Graham.

One morning Gregor Samsa awakes to find himself changed. To those around him, he is a dangerous, untouchable vermin. Worse than that, he is a burden.

A word said, an action out of place, the opening of old wounds, none of which can be undone. Until now Gregor has woken every morning, quietly left to take the same train, and worked to pay off the family debt. But that world explodes on this morning of brutal metamorphosis.

In their first commission since 2019, Frantic Assembly and Lemn Sissay O.B.E. collaborate on this thrilling new adaptation of Metamorphosis. Combining the fluidity and lyricism of Lemn Sissay’s adaptation and Frantic’s uncompromising physicality, this promises to be an unmissable retelling of Franz Kafka’s shocking tale of cruelty and kindness; a visceral and vital depiction of humans struggling within a system that crushes them under its heel.

Age Guidance: 13+
The performance on Thursday 26th will be followed by a post show discussion
Commissioned and produced by Frantic Assembly, in a co-production with Theatre Royal Plymouth, Curve, MAST Mayflower Studios and Lyric Hammersmith Theatre

Caroline Liversidge, Paula Penman and Bob Nicholson in association with Northern Stage

In a cobweb covered attic, above a dark and dusty house, a series of spooky surprises unfolds and the coffin lid is lifted on a secret that is best kept out of the sunlight… because you can count on vampires to keep their mouths shut… or can you?

A fang-tastic Halloween treat for little vampires who are losing their milk teeth, aged 7 and under, with music and puppets. From the team that brought you The Gingerbread Man this is a Halloween treat you can really sink your teeth into… Ah ha ha…

11am & 2pm
Age Guidance: 7 and under
50 mins (no interval)
BSL interpreted performances: Thu 2 Nov, 11:00 am, Thu 2 Nov, 2:00 pm, Sat 4 Nov, 11:00 am
All performances are relaxed

Do you believe in ghosts?

Are UFOs real?

Is the impossible possible?

Join Danny Robins, creator of the smash hit BBC Radio 4 paranormal podcasts Uncanny, The Battersea Poltergeist and The Witch Farm and award-winning West End play 2:22 – A Ghost Story, for the biggest investigation into the paranormal – ever.

In UNCANNY: I KNOW WHAT I SAW, you’ll be immersed in the sights, sounds and scares of brand new, real-life stories of the supernatural, from ghosts and poltergeists to UFO sightings and other strange encounters. Watch as these creepy, thrilling tales are brought to life on stage by Danny and his ever-present team of experts.

Is what happened genuinely supernatural or can it be explained?

Are you #TeamBeliever or #TeamSceptic?

You’ll even have a chance to share your own stories, if you dare.

Warning: This show will make you jump, laugh, think and question the very nature of reality!

Touching, funny and utterly original, Freckle Productions’ delightful adaptation of Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler’s Stick Man is back in town!

What starts off as a morning jog becomes quite the misadventure for Stick Man: a dog wants to play fetch with him, a swan builds a nest with him, and he even ends up on a fire! How will Stick Man ever get back to the family tree?

This award-winning production, from the team behind Zog and Zog and the Flying Doctors, features a trio of top actors and is packed full of puppetry, songs, live music and funky moves.

60mins

The voice of young disabled people often goes unheard. But not anymore – this raucous, radical, celebratory, and hard-hitting hip hop gig theatre show shares the good times and the not-so-good times of being young and disabled in 2023.

Funny, raw and surprising stories told by an amazing collective of actors, beatboxers, and dancers. With creative captioning, integrated sign language and integrated audio description.

Expect heavy beats, stunning visuals and full hearts.

Co-produced by 20 Stories High, Graeae Theatre Company, Liverpool Everyman & Playhouse and LEEDS 2023

Supported by Arts Council England, Paul Hamlyn Foundation, The Coutts Foundation, Backstage Trust, Liverpool City Council, and Arts Council England Project Grant

Age guidance 14+
2hrs
All performances audio described and BSL interpreted

What does it feel like to have faith, to hold power, to find community? Disciples is a joyful, dynamic performance that comes to life through a blend of music, movement, text and image – led by poetry.

Devised by an ensemble cast of women and non-binary people who identify as D/deaf, disabled, and neurodivergent, the show is a powerful act of collaboration that places often-ignored stories at the centre of its world.

All performances audio described, and captioned and will include creative use of BSL performed by a member of the cast throughout.

The show is led by movement director Rachel Drazek and poet and playwright Ellen Renton and devised with the ensemble.

1hr 20min
Age Guidance: 14+
All performances audio described and captioned
Relaxed performance: Wed 8 Nov, 7:30 pm

A Pentabus and Thickskin co-production

A new play by Tim Foley

Co-directed by Elle While (Pentabus) and Neil Bettles (ThickSkin)

These are the shores of Vikings, Victorians, van drivers and visions. The tide is out but the chips are hot.

Two brothers go for walks along the beach at Seaton Carew. Their Dad is dying, and their town is crumbling. Family rifts and political divides try to pull them apart, and a figure made of driftwood stalks the shore at night…

An inspiring, expansive story about hope, love, belonging and the tides within us, Pentabus and Thickskin present this intoxicating and mystical new play by award-winning writer Tim Foley.

1hr 10mins
Age Guidance: 12+
All performances have integrated creative captions

Seventy minutes. Seven seasons. One Spike.

This fast-paced gem brings you the entire 144 episodes of the hit 90s TV show, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, as told through the eyes of the one person who knows it inside out… Spike. Buffy Revamped tours the UK this Autumn following its award-winning Edinburgh Fringe premiere in 2022 and two sold-out national tours.

Funny, satirical and bursting with 90s pop-culture references, it’s the perfect parody for Buffy aficionados and those who never enrolled at Sunnydale High alike.

Created by comedian Brendan Murphy whose last show, FRIEND (The One with Gunther), won Best Play at the World Wide Comedy Awards.

Winner: Best One Person Show and Best Comedy Performance at the DarkChat Awards 2022.

1hr 15 mins (no interval)
Age Guidance: 13+

Yorkshire’s very own Glitterbomb Dancers present their debut, full length Christmas Show: a cabaret remake of the family classic, The Nutcracker. Sugar plum fairies, toy soldiers and snowflakes… with a drag comedy twist!

This alternative holiday show combines all the festive fun of the original ballet with the Glitterbomb Dancers’ signature playfulness. Expect a high energy mix of classical music and pop songs, performed with high kicks and splits. A bit of camp, a bit of punk, a little bit of crass and a whole lot of sass, this is The Nutcracker like you’ve never seen it before!

Glitterbomb Dancers are a queer cabaret dance troupe, making short, spectacular dance numbers, prancing their way around the UK. They combine high quality dance with pop, spandex and camp energy.

2hrs
Age Guidance: 13+

What was it really like to rule and be ruled in the?Ancient Roman world???In her international best-seller?SPQR, Mary Beard told the thousand-year story of ancient Rome. Now, she shines her spotlight on the emperors who ruled the Roman empire, from Julius Caesar (assassinated 44 BCE) to Alexander Severus (assassinated 235 CE).?Emperor of Rome takes the reader into the palace corridors, and beyond the hype of politics, power and succession. It’s a revolutionary approach to an apparently familiar subject and will change forever our idea of ancient history.

Mary Beard is Emerita Professor and Fellow of Newnham College, Cambridge and the classics editor of the TLS. She has worldwide academic acclaim. Her previous books include the bestselling, Pompeii,?SPQR, and Women & Power. She has made numerous TV series and her books have been published in over thirty languages.

Chaired by Professor Edith Hall Book sales and signing after the event, with The Bound bookshop

New Writing North present an evening with Mary Beard, to celebrate the publication of her new book Emperor of Rome.

Bridget Christie is hot, but not in a good way. The 51 year old critically – acclaimed stand up leaks blood, sweats, and thinks that Chris Rock is the same person as The Rock. The Foster’s Edinburgh Comedy Award winning comedian cannot ride the motorbike she bought to combat her mid-life crisis because of early osteoarthritis in her hips and RSI in her wrist; and wonders why there are so many films, made by men, about young women discovering their sexuality, but none about middle-aged women forgetting theirs. It’s a menopause laugh-a-minute with a confused, furious, sweaty lady who is annoyed by everything.

Brand new show from the Rose d’Or and South Bank Sky Arts Award winner, star of her own Netflix special, Taskmaster favourite, Channel 4 sitcom The Change and BBC Radio 4 series Bridget Christie Minds the Gap and Mortal.

80mins including interval
All performances captioned
Age guidance: 14+

Kitchen Zoo in association with Northern Stage present…

The Three Bears

Deep in the forest Mammy, Daddy and Baby Bear are preparing for winter and, of course, Christmas. Each day the Three Bears head into the woods to collect interesting things to re-use for their home. As winter arrives their cosy house is turned upside down by a colourful whirlwind that threatens to sit in their chairs, eat their porridge and sleep in their beds. It’s Goldilocks!

So bring your bears and join us for a winter adventure in the woods with original music, puppets and a tale you thought you knew.

Age Guidance: Under 5s

Your wings already exist, all you have to do is learn to fly.

Next Christmas, why not try a different kind of fairytale? Feisty, fun, joyful and with some baddies that you’ll love to hate.

Ella misses her mother and father. Her step-mother is the worst, a horrible bully determined to make her life a misery. Her step-brother and sister are no help. Nature is her escape and the birds seem to be her only friends.

But, when she meets a pretty cool boy in the woods, her heart begins to flutter, her mind races and she begins to believe in the magical power of love.

And then: an invitation for all of us to join in the festive cheer at the Queen’s Christmas ball!

Full of music, dance, puppetry and comedy, Cinderella is a retelling of this classical tale for anyone who has ever dreamed that good will always win.

Lace up your boots, make a wish and let’s join Ella for a glorious girl-powered adventure.

2hrs (including interval)
Age guidance: 6+. Content warning: please be aware that the show will contain some elements of mild violence.
Audio described: Sat 23 Dec, 1pm & Fri 29 Dec, 5pm
BSL interpreted: Fri 15 Dec, 6pm & Sun 24 Dec, 1pm
Captioned: Sat 16 Dec, 5pm & Thu 28 Dec, 1pm
Relaxed performance: Sun 17 Dec, 1pm & Wed 20 Dec, 10am

No Script. No Score. No Kids!

Newcastle’s infamous improv comedy troupe is back with their hilarious epic misadventure into the unknown.

Taking inspiration from your suggestions, the devilishly talented team will spin your ideas, woven into new imaginings of the Cinderella stage, into a magical musical tale of good versus evil. On the spot! Never seen before. Never to be seen again.

8pm
Age Guidance: 18+
RUNNING TIME: 150 mins

THE CREW ARE BACK FOR ANOTHER ROAR-SOME ADVENTURE!

Zog, super keen student turned air-ambulance, still lands with a bang-crash-thump. Together with his Flying Doctor crew, Princess Pearl and Sir Gadabout, they tend to a sunburnt mermaid, a unicorn with one too many horns and a lion with the flu. However, Pearl’s uncle, the King, has other ideas about whether princesses should be doctors, and she’s soon locked up in the castle back in a crown and a silly frilly dress!

With a bit of help from some friends and half a pound of cheese, can Pearl make her uncle better and prove princesses can be doctors too?

Based on Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler’s bestselling sequel, Freckle Productions (Zog, Stick Man, Tiddler & Other Terrific Tales) are back, with music and lyrics by Joe Stilgoe (Zog), for this truly modern take on the classic fairy tale.

Most suitable for ages 3+ but all ages welcome.
BSL interpreted performance: Fri 23 Feb, 1:30 pm
Relaxed performance: Wed 21 Feb, 1:30 pm
Artwork © Julia Donaldson & Axel Scheffler